...profuse apologies from a Part-Time Writer who appears to be getting more and more part-time! All I can ask is your patience as I battle my way through depression brought about by the DWP and their decision to cut my benefits by more than half.
At the moment, my time is spent in two ways:
1. Curling up under the duvet in an attempt to spend no money on food or electricity.
2. On the computer; not writing but frantically searching for a job that meets my requirements for living a happy life, and not one where I'm contemplating cutting my wrists with the food processor blades.
Saying that, I did work out a brief outline for the next four or five chapters of Agoraphobics Anonymous and I started work on the next chapter yesterday (whilst simultaneously praying for my car to pass its MOT - it didn't, but thankfully it was only £90.85 in total to get the MOT and repairs necessary). Because the group follows the 12 steps of Alcoholics Anonymous (indeed, any Anonymous group), I'm writing a few chapters based on Step 2 - finding a Higher Power to believe in. David and Angie are pairing up to discuss their own particual beliefs and finding they enjoy each others virtual company (even though they have vastly different Higher Powers to look up to). Poor old Ryan is sitting nearby, feigning interest in his book, while Angie ignores him in favour of her new friend.
Coming up soon is a neat little idea I discovered in my research: The Panic Pizza. Great idea, but poor old Ryan's going to walk away from the evening feeling rather sad.
My NaNoWriMo Word Count Widgets!
Tuesday, 12 June 2012
Thursday, 31 May 2012
20,000 words and counting...
..well, I've broken the 20,000 word barrier with Agoraphobics Anonymous at long last! Blame the gorgeous weather and even more gorgeous Lovely Boyfriend for the sloth-like speed! We've been making the most of the sunshine - taking Mad Mutt out for some lovely walks around the Angus countryside and turning my garden into a garden (rather than a place where wild bushes grow). But it's now turned back to true Scottish weather and I can concentrate on writing again. It's not raining in the traditional sense; it's just the air is full of water.....
So - where do I stand with the writing? Hospital Corners has been rejected by all 15 agencies I sent it to, and I'm going to start preparing the next round of submissions next week (once Lovely Boyfriend has disappeared back to his oil rig). Once I've been rejected by all the agencies, I'll turn to small publishers and then to self-publishing. The publishing world is full of people like me - first time authors with a manuscript and social network connections. Self publishing is taking off with the likes of Kindle offering free/cheap books....the days of advances and signing fees are over for Miss Joe Average. So I'll offer my work to the big, bad world by myself and keep trying with the next book. That doesn't mean I wouldn't accept a big, fat advance cheque and contract from an agent/publisher though!
Agoraphobics Anonymous - I've looked at all my research notes and now I need to start linking the sections together in a vaguely logical way, without tying myself down too much. I've written a fun "Socratic Dialogue" chapter but now I want to move onto the relationship between Angie and David rather than Angie and Ryan....that's what the SP promises and that's what I shall deliver! It's a fine line between walking the characters through the necessary therapy and over-egging the pudding and writing a self-help book. That's not my intention so I shall be working hard over the next couple of weeks to get the characters talking to me again.
That's if a new idea doesn't take over first. I had a dream the other night which has definite possibilities as a story....possibly a longish short story or novella rather than a full length book, but it's a great little idea and I'm glad I wrote it down before it disappeared on me! A lot of research will be needed, however.....watch this space!
So - where do I stand with the writing? Hospital Corners has been rejected by all 15 agencies I sent it to, and I'm going to start preparing the next round of submissions next week (once Lovely Boyfriend has disappeared back to his oil rig). Once I've been rejected by all the agencies, I'll turn to small publishers and then to self-publishing. The publishing world is full of people like me - first time authors with a manuscript and social network connections. Self publishing is taking off with the likes of Kindle offering free/cheap books....the days of advances and signing fees are over for Miss Joe Average. So I'll offer my work to the big, bad world by myself and keep trying with the next book. That doesn't mean I wouldn't accept a big, fat advance cheque and contract from an agent/publisher though!
Agoraphobics Anonymous - I've looked at all my research notes and now I need to start linking the sections together in a vaguely logical way, without tying myself down too much. I've written a fun "Socratic Dialogue" chapter but now I want to move onto the relationship between Angie and David rather than Angie and Ryan....that's what the SP promises and that's what I shall deliver! It's a fine line between walking the characters through the necessary therapy and over-egging the pudding and writing a self-help book. That's not my intention so I shall be working hard over the next couple of weeks to get the characters talking to me again.
That's if a new idea doesn't take over first. I had a dream the other night which has definite possibilities as a story....possibly a longish short story or novella rather than a full length book, but it's a great little idea and I'm glad I wrote it down before it disappeared on me! A lot of research will be needed, however.....watch this space!
Wednesday, 16 May 2012
Apologies for my absence...
...it's been a few weeks since I last posted and it's all been down to the DWP. I've been super-stressed about having to appeal their decision, and it doesn't help that other benefits have now been stopped because I'm not "entitled" to ESA. So - no Income Support and, as a domino effect, no Housing or Council Tax benefit, which meant a letter from the Council demanding rent payments from this week....so I spent much of last week either in bed or curled up on the sofa. I still don't have a solution to the problem, but I've done all I can (sent in an appeal - which means a tribunal in 2 to 6 months time. But it also means I get placed onto an assessment rate and can re-start Income Support etc).
Anyway - this is a writing blog so what have I been writing? Not much. My confidence took a mighty knock when BOTH books went crashing out of MAYhem in the first round. However, I started reading Ag Anon again yesterday, re-writing bits here and there. I also have another bit of the plot sewn up - the reason why David is paranoid about spiders. It was one of those things I threw in out of nowhere, so I'm pleased I've managed to come up with a reason!
I'm off to take a look at chapters 6 onwards before deciding what happens next.
Anyway - this is a writing blog so what have I been writing? Not much. My confidence took a mighty knock when BOTH books went crashing out of MAYhem in the first round. However, I started reading Ag Anon again yesterday, re-writing bits here and there. I also have another bit of the plot sewn up - the reason why David is paranoid about spiders. It was one of those things I threw in out of nowhere, so I'm pleased I've managed to come up with a reason!
I'm off to take a look at chapters 6 onwards before deciding what happens next.
Friday, 27 April 2012
Fresh panic...
....according to a 20 minute interview with a nurse who didn't have any of my medical records and hadn't spoken to my psychiatrist OR psychologist, I'm fit for work. The fact I go to the supermarket means I'm able to cope with unplanned changes....if anyone can work that one out, please let me know! And, despite the fact Lovely Boyfriend had to drive me to the assessment centre, I'm able to go to unknown places on my own! Grr....
Combined with some grumblings with ex-hubby, it's meant another week of not much writing. However, I've now entered Agoraphobics Anonymous into Mayhem (a fun competition on Authonomy where something like 120 books battle it out to see which one gets the most votes). I'd already entered Hospital Corners, but we were running short in a couple of groups and I volunteered Ag Anon to fill a slot. SO - despite all the stress and worry I have about things out of my control, I'm going to spend my morning working on Ag Anon, because that IS within my control. Oh...and sending my psychologist a very long, rambling, panicky text message asking for her help!
Combined with some grumblings with ex-hubby, it's meant another week of not much writing. However, I've now entered Agoraphobics Anonymous into Mayhem (a fun competition on Authonomy where something like 120 books battle it out to see which one gets the most votes). I'd already entered Hospital Corners, but we were running short in a couple of groups and I volunteered Ag Anon to fill a slot. SO - despite all the stress and worry I have about things out of my control, I'm going to spend my morning working on Ag Anon, because that IS within my control. Oh...and sending my psychologist a very long, rambling, panicky text message asking for her help!
Saturday, 21 April 2012
Panic over...
...the book, I mean. I've finally worked my way through all of "When Panic Attacks" and now the fun begins! I've typed up pages of notes about all the different techniques I think I might use in Ag Anon and I'm going to print them out then cut them up into the different exercises/discussions. Then I'll be able to work out some sort of order for them to appear in....I can't have the anti-procrastination section if Angie hasn't been procrastinating over step 1 of her anxiety ladder; and she can't create an anxiety ladder if she hasn't first partaken of her panic pizza; and she can't do that until she's....you see what I mean?
I find it utterly ironic, by the way, that the chapter I kept stopping at was the one covering procrastination!
Anyway - I'm hoping the toga scene will get written next week before Lovely Boyfriend gets home and I get all distracted through not seeing him for so long (2 weeks tomorrow - boo!) Then I'll be taking much of the following week off as we're taking dog and caravan to Inverness for a few days - lovely.
Why a toga? Well, why not....
I find it utterly ironic, by the way, that the chapter I kept stopping at was the one covering procrastination!
Anyway - I'm hoping the toga scene will get written next week before Lovely Boyfriend gets home and I get all distracted through not seeing him for so long (2 weeks tomorrow - boo!) Then I'll be taking much of the following week off as we're taking dog and caravan to Inverness for a few days - lovely.
Why a toga? Well, why not....
Wednesday, 18 April 2012
A day of rest....
...after a busy day yesterday. Perhaps I was being overly ambitious - an hour of Zumba in the morning followed by an hour of dancing for Fame in the evening? I'm very aware of some of my muscles today.....
Rehearsals are going well for Fame and the show is going to be a lot of fun. A lot of hard work but very enjoyable. There were quite a few grunts, snorts and giggles last night as we attempted a basic lift! I must say it's nice to have an almost equal number of males and females for a change!
How's Ag Anon going, I hear you ask (and if you weren't asking, well I must be hearing things!)? Pretty well, although I've had to stop for a few days for more research. I'm sitting at just over 14,000 words now, and it's all uploaded at www.authonomy.com/books/43276/agoraphobics-anonymous
I already have 3 very positive comments and 4 backers (how many of them will be long-term remains to be seen!).
Today I'm going to add in some emails between Tracey (the Ag Anon moderator) and Rhona (the psychiatrist who devised the programme). If you've read Hospital Corners, you'll remember Rhona. She was Esme's flatmate and friend during their nurses training, before training in psychiatry and counselling Stewart. She was Dr B's mentor for a few years before retiring, and now she's helping out Tracey, a recovering alcoholic and agoraphobic. She's also Ryan's Auntie R (although I should probably make mention that she's his Great-Aunt, seeing as she's in her mid to late 70s by this point!).
As for Hospital Corners - it's still doing the rejection rounds of agents. I've had 6 definite rejections and can only presume that the remaining 9 agents are also going to say no. In another 4 weeks I'll send off round 2 and see if that has any better luck. It might help that I can now reference my latest book, to show I'm not planning on being a one-trick pony.
So saying, I'd better get cracking! And I've just realised that I made myself a cup of tea over an hour ago and it's still sitting in the kitchen.....
Rehearsals are going well for Fame and the show is going to be a lot of fun. A lot of hard work but very enjoyable. There were quite a few grunts, snorts and giggles last night as we attempted a basic lift! I must say it's nice to have an almost equal number of males and females for a change!
How's Ag Anon going, I hear you ask (and if you weren't asking, well I must be hearing things!)? Pretty well, although I've had to stop for a few days for more research. I'm sitting at just over 14,000 words now, and it's all uploaded at www.authonomy.com/books/43276/agoraphobics-anonymous
I already have 3 very positive comments and 4 backers (how many of them will be long-term remains to be seen!).
Today I'm going to add in some emails between Tracey (the Ag Anon moderator) and Rhona (the psychiatrist who devised the programme). If you've read Hospital Corners, you'll remember Rhona. She was Esme's flatmate and friend during their nurses training, before training in psychiatry and counselling Stewart. She was Dr B's mentor for a few years before retiring, and now she's helping out Tracey, a recovering alcoholic and agoraphobic. She's also Ryan's Auntie R (although I should probably make mention that she's his Great-Aunt, seeing as she's in her mid to late 70s by this point!).
As for Hospital Corners - it's still doing the rejection rounds of agents. I've had 6 definite rejections and can only presume that the remaining 9 agents are also going to say no. In another 4 weeks I'll send off round 2 and see if that has any better luck. It might help that I can now reference my latest book, to show I'm not planning on being a one-trick pony.
So saying, I'd better get cracking! And I've just realised that I made myself a cup of tea over an hour ago and it's still sitting in the kitchen.....
Wednesday, 4 April 2012
Still researching...
...although I'm starting to get a stronger idea of the shape of the work Angela and David will go through in their bid to overcome Agoraphobia. The people in Bath weren't helpful in the end, but I've got a couple of books of my own which are providing some structure, and I've borrowed a copy of Alcoholics Anonymous "12 steps and Traditions" because I want Agoraphobics Anonymous to run on similar lines, but with a heaping of CBT and Exposure Therapy on the side. Agoraphobics Anonymous really is the place for those people who have given up hope of ever living a reasonable life ever again.
I'm hoping to have enough of a structure in place so I can get back to being creative and break that first 10,000 word barrier in the next week...but I'm struggling at the moment with my own mental health issues. I'm in the middle of being "assessed" by the Department for Work and Pensions for my benefits and they may force me back into work....I'll tell you - researching Agoraphobia has kicked off even more of my own issues! Under some of the criteria given in these self-help books, I'm bordering on it myself! And I'm trying not to push myself into doing the exercises in the place of Angela and David - I've got enough to deal with with all my other "issues"! So, I've had a few days feeling rather overwhelmed by the number of things I "could" be working on, and wondering how many I "should" be working on....combine that with a tight rehearsal schedule for my next show in September and there's one stressed out chocoholic at the moment (never good when Easter is just around the corner and the shops are full of cheap deals!).
Never mind - I'm hoping things will settle down in the next week or so and I can start feeling happy with my life again. Poor Lovely Boyfriend has had to put up with many tearful sessions while I try and explain that even though I'm getting depressed, I'm actually happy with things...honestly!
I'm hoping to have enough of a structure in place so I can get back to being creative and break that first 10,000 word barrier in the next week...but I'm struggling at the moment with my own mental health issues. I'm in the middle of being "assessed" by the Department for Work and Pensions for my benefits and they may force me back into work....I'll tell you - researching Agoraphobia has kicked off even more of my own issues! Under some of the criteria given in these self-help books, I'm bordering on it myself! And I'm trying not to push myself into doing the exercises in the place of Angela and David - I've got enough to deal with with all my other "issues"! So, I've had a few days feeling rather overwhelmed by the number of things I "could" be working on, and wondering how many I "should" be working on....combine that with a tight rehearsal schedule for my next show in September and there's one stressed out chocoholic at the moment (never good when Easter is just around the corner and the shops are full of cheap deals!).
Never mind - I'm hoping things will settle down in the next week or so and I can start feeling happy with my life again. Poor Lovely Boyfriend has had to put up with many tearful sessions while I try and explain that even though I'm getting depressed, I'm actually happy with things...honestly!
Subscribe to:
Posts (Atom)